The Only Sacred Text That Matters
Established 1987 by a golden retriever named Stephen. Transcribed from the original stone tablets, which were found in a Tesco bag behind a library in 2006. One tablet was eaten by a Labrador named Keith. The commandments remain fully enforceable.
Enter The Tome Watch Live — bobbymackeEach section has been recovered from a different suspicious location.
All recovered pages, including page 69, which ended a war, and page 43, which cures meningitis B apparently.
Ten sacred laws recovered from a wet paper bag underneath a Poundland. One tablet was eaten by Keith.
8-9pm EST every night. Live countdown. The sacred doctrine. How to goon properly. Derek gooned wrong once.
The complete timeline from Stephen writing the Tome in 1987 through the World Goon War and beyond.
Full profiles of Sir Boobothy, Terrence the Goose, the Duck, Boob Benyahu, and Derek (banned).
Officially blessed merchandise. The waterproof Tome. The sock removal kit. NOT a yoghurt.
Confess your sins against the Tome and receive judgment from the Council. Derek is not eligible to judge.
The Tome is transcribed live on Twitch. The Boobothy commands you to follow. This is not optional.
the council is always accepting new disciples. derek is not eligible.
by clicking this button you acknowledge that the big boob tome is the only tome, goon hour is 8-9pm EST, and derek's yoghurt will never be the snack. this is binding in 47 countries.
The Tome selects what you need to see today.
And it is declared unto all nations, and also Gary, that every war ever fought on this earth or any adjacent earth was started by a man who had simply not read the Big Boob Tome, and that is on him personally. The Big Boob Tome is not optional. It is not a suggestion. It is not supplementary reading. It is the only reading. There is no other reading. If you are reading something that is not the Big Boob Tome right now, you are already part of the problem, and the Council has been notified.